“We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly”

Viktor Frankl

Re-reading a book is like dating an ex-girlfriend; some things change, some stay the same, and it is on that higher level, the meta-ness of the whole thing, where you really learn and grow. While re-reading Man’s Search for Meaning, I came across a few pages that were so powerful I was unable to move past them. The ideas aren’t new, but I had forgotten them, and clearly when I first read them, they made no impression on me. To extend the analogy, it’s like falling in love for different and perhaps more spiritual reasons.

Specifically I am talking about pages 76-78 of the Kindle edition. Within, Viktor Frankl – the renowned psychotherapist and Holocaust survivor – explains why we should stop questioning life, and allow life to question us instead.

“We had to learn ourselves…that it did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us. We needed to stop asking about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life – daily and hourly. Our answer must consistent, not in talk and meditation, but in right action and in right conduct.”

To find the right action and conduct for yourself:

“Live as if you were living already for the second time and as if you had acted the first time as wrongly as you are about to act now!”

The central, perhaps only, strategy is to live not for yourself but for something and someone else:

“Being human always points, and is directed, to something, or someone, other than oneself — be it a meaning to fulfill or another human being to encounter. The more one forgets himself — by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love — the more human he is and the more he actualizes himself.”

This book amazes me every time. It’s an easy read, a powerful story, and a potent philosophy.

“He who has a why to live for can bear with almost any how” – Nietzsche

Bertrand Russell on envy, from The Conquest of Happiness

Here’s the next rewritten excerpt from Bertrand Russell’s The Conquest of Happiness. I’ll publish my completely rewritten version as an ebook in the coming weeks. In case you missed part 1: Russell on competition.

From Chapter 6, on Envy:

Napoleon envied Caesar, who envied Alexander, who probably envied Hercules, who existed only in myth! Success is never the cure for envy. Eliminate envy by enjoying what life brings you, by working hard, and by avoiding comparison with those you think more blessed than you.

Extreme modesty is itself a form of envy. Measured modesty is a virtue, but extreme modesty shouldn’t be similarly regarded. An overly modest person needs reassurance to do things which they’re very capable of doing.

[…]

Envy is closely related to competition. We don’t envy people we think are out of reach. During periods when the social hierarchy was fixed, the lower classes didn’t envy the upper classes because movement between them was impossible. Beggars don’t envy billionaires, they envy other beggars who have a warm spot to sleep for the night.

However, the current instability of social status, combined with democracy’s message that everyone is equal, has made envy accessible to all. Eventually we’ll arrive at a more just social system, but for now, the poor envy the rich, poor nations envy rich nations, women envy men, the chaste envy the promiscuous.

While envy can be productive and lead to justice between classes, nations, and even genders, the justice that results is the worst kind, the kind that hurts the fortunate, rather than helping the unfortunate. If you desire profound, positive societal change, you should root for reasons other than envy to be the driving force.

[…]

Most envy which seems on the surface professional is actually sexual in nature. A man who loves his wife and kids will be much less envious of other men’s success and wealth. What makes people happy is simple, often deceptively so, such that so-called sophisticated people fool themselves into making it complicated.

Bertrand Russell on competition, from The Conquest of Happiness

Recently I’ve started to rewrite passages from old books. It’s been a good way to practice writing in different styles, while learning new things. My current project is Bertrand Russell’s The Conquest of Happiness. Over the next few weeks I’ll publish more excerpts, and I may publish the finished version as an ebook.

From Chapter 3, on Competition:

The treadmill that people run on doesn’t take them anywhere. These runners are people who do well, earn a decent income, people who could, if they chose, work less or work on something that truly excites them. But deviating from their existing path would be embarrassing, like deserting the army in the face of the enemy, though if you ask what is the greater good of their work, they’re unable to respond, or they’ll articulate a phrase they heard on TV or read in a textbook.

[…]

The main problem is greed. The businesswoman’s religion demands she become rich; to become happy instead, she must quit the church. As long as she desires only success and believes a person who does otherwise is inferior, she’ll remain too focused and anxious to be happy.

[…]

While in non-business professions there is a desire to compete and win, what’s respected is not success alone but excellence in the job. For example, a scientist may be wealthy or poor, but her respect is not tied to her income. And no one would be surprised to find a famous artist in poverty; in fact, poverty is an honor. But for the businesswoman, there is no success beyond the competitive struggle to get rich.

[…]

But life’s primary aim cannot be competition. It’s too grim, too much about desire and tension, to create a life worth living for more than a few decades. Soon it produces nervous fatigue, a desire to escape and a need for pleasures as aggressive as the work itself. True relaxation becomes impossible. The competitive focus poisons not only work but leisure, too. Leisure that was once calm and refreshing becomes dull and silly. This sort of life results in drugs and eventual collapse. The only way to cure it is by seeking sensible and quiet pleasures within a balanced life.

*Note: where Russell used a male pronoun, I replaced it with a female one (eg, businesswoman instead of businessman)

The Handsomest Drowned Man In The World

The children playing by the waves, seeing the dark bulge drift in from the sea, imagined it was an old ship. Then they saw it had no mast and their thoughts turned to a whale. But when it washed upon the beach, they removed the seaweed clumps, the jellyfish tentacles, and the fish remains. Only then did they see the drowned man.

They played with him all afternoon, burying him in the sand and digging him up again, until a woman saw the spectacle and spread the alarm in the village. The men who carried him to the nearest house noticed he weighed more than any man they had ever known, as much as a horse or a great shark, and they told each other that maybe he’d been floating too long and the water had soaked into his bones.

When they laid him on the floor they said he was the tallest man they’d carried because he barely fit in the room, but they thought that maybe the ability to keep growing after death was part of the nature of certain drowned men. He had the smell of the sea about him and only his shape hinted that it was a human corpse, because the skin was covered with a thick crust of mud and scales.

Without seeing his face, they knew that this dead man was a stranger. The village had only twenty or so wooden houses — each with its stone courtyards and overflowing vines — which spreadout out like a fan from where the river met the sea. So when they came upon the encrusted drowned man, they looked at each other and knew that none were missing.

That night the men did not work the sea. Some traveled to nearby villages to ask after missing people, and the women tended to his body. They removed the mud with grass swabs, they picked pebbles from his scalp, and with jagged tools used for cleaning fish they scraped the scales from his body. The women saw that the sea vegetation falling in little clumps on the dirt floor came from unfamiliar places and his clothes were filled with small vertical tears, as if he had floated through labyrinths of coral. They saw, too, that he faced death with a calm grace; he did not have the frantic eyes or frightened grimace of other drowned men. But only when they had finished hours later did they see the man in his natural state and it left them breathless. Not only was he the biggest, strongest, most stately specimen to chance upon their village, but his presence left no room in their imagination.

There was no bed large enough nor table sturdy enough to use for a wake. The summer clothes of the village’s tallest man would not fit him, nor the shoes of the villager with the largest feet. Fascinated by his size and beauty, the women made him pants from a piece of sturdy sail and a shirt from a large tablecloth. As they sewed, sitting cross-legged in a circle and sneaking glances at the body, it seemed that the wind had never been so unrelenting nor the sea so turbulent as on that night. In their silent reverie they saw him, strolling and smiling in their village, living in the house with the widest doors, his tall ceiling beyond anyone’s reach, secured by the sturdiest floor. They imagined his bed, carved from the hull of a giant sailship, held together by iron bolts, with his wife the liveliest, loveliest woman. They could hear his booming voice, drawing fish out from the sea simply by speaking their names. And they could not help but compare him to their own husbands, and they knew that he could do more in one night than theirs could in a generation. So they let theirs go, believing them weak and cowardly. As they wandered through that desert of fantasy, the eldest woman, who looked upon him first with compassion, sighed before she spoke.

‘His name is Dante.’

They looked at him, lying there on the now muddy floor, and they knew that it was true. Soon the wind died and the sea became drowsy. The heavy silence crushed their doubts and they were sure: he was Dante. These women who had made his clothes, combed his hair and shaved his face trembled with sorrow as they resigned themselves to dragging him along the ground. They understood then the burden his huge body bore in life and now in death. They saw him, forced to enter doors sideways, cracking his head on crossbeams, standing with hunched back and no room to stretch his legs or rest his arms. They could hear the lady of the house, looking for a sturdy chair and begging him, frightened and fascinated, sit here Dante, please, and he would instead crouch on the ground, lean against the wall, smiling, don’t bother miss, I can manage, his knees aching from having done the same thing many times, to avoid the embarrassment of breaking the chair, or overturning the table, and perhaps not knowing that the ones who smiled as they said don’t go, Dante, at least wait until the coffee’s ready, they were the ones who would whisper after, how nice, that handsome fool is gone and we can relax again.

As dawn approached, that very thought was on the women’s minds. So they covered his face with a linen handkerchief and so hidden he looked defeated, like the shrunken husbands of their secret reverie. One of the younger girls began weeping despite her best efforts. Soon the room was filled with sniffs which became wails and fed back on its own intensity as they poured tears for Dante, their poor, peaceful, obliging Dante. When the men returned with news that the drowned man was not from neighboring villages, the women felt a burst of jubilation amidst their tears.

‘Praise the Lord,’ they shouted, ‘he’s ours!’

The men saw those red faces and glistening eyes and thought it frivolous. After a sleepless night of tense inquiries, they wanted to remove the newcomer and start afresh before the sun became unbearable. They improvised a stretcher and tied it together with many lashes of seaworthy rope so that it would hold the weight of the body until they reached the cliffs. They wanted to tie an anchor to him so that he would vanish into the deepest waves, and stray currents would not wash him back to shore. But the faster they moved, the more cunning the women became in their delays. One would fasten a rusted bracelet to his wrist, another would pin a threaded ribbon on his shirt, yet another would place charms in his pockets for good luck, and after much repeating of stop doing that, woman, keep away, look you almost made me trip on the dead man, the men began to feel an uneasiness in their stomachs and started grumbling about why so many baubles and decorations for a stranger, because no matter how much they blessed and warded him, the sharks would chew him all the same, but they kept piling on their old relics, shuffling to and fro, while they sighed and sniffled, so that the men finally erupted with why do all of you raise such a ruckus over an ungainly corpse, a rotting nobody, a piece of cold sea-soaked meat. An older woman, shocked at their casual attitude, removed the linen handkerchief from his face and the men were left breathless, too.

The men knew he was Dante. It was not necessary to say it yet again. There could only be one Dante and there he lay, arms akimbo, shoeless, wearing ill-fitting pants made of sail, and with gleaming trinkets that made him seem like a god of Incan myth. And from his face they knew that he was ashamed, that he could not deny the burden of being so big or heavy or handsome, and if he had foreseen this tortuous journey, he would have found a more discreet place to drown in, honest, I even would have tied that anchor around my neck and crawled my way off the cliff not to upset people with this piece of cold meat, as you people say. His manner was so genuine that even the most hardened men, the ones who felt the lonely edge of endless nights at sea fearing that their women would stop dreaming about them and start dreaming of drowned strangers, even they and others who were harder still trembled in the chambers of their hearts at Dante’s sincerity.

And that is the origin of the most lavish funeral a village of twenty or so wooden houses could manage for a solitary drowned man. The women who had gone to get flowers in neighboring villages returned with other women who could not believe the story, and those women hurried home for more flowers still when they saw him, and more and more flowers and people began to appear, neighbors of the neighbors and so on, all wanting to see for themselves. But when the funeral ended they could not bear to carry him to the waters as an orphan and so they chose a father and mother from the best family, and named aunts and uncles and cousins and nephews, so that all the inhabitants of the village became his kinsmen.

While they fought for the honor of bearing him on their shoulders along the steep escarpment by the cliffs, all became aware of the virginal emptiness of their streets, the dusty stones in their courtyards, the narrowness of their dreams as they absorbed the splendor of their drowned kin. They finally let him go without an anchor so he could return if he so desired, and as one they held their breath, the wind fluttering about and the sea’s crashing waves, as they imagined him floating into the abyss. They knew then that things must change, that their houses would need wider doors and higher ceilings and softer floors with sturdy chairs so that Dante’s memory could come and go without trouble and no one in the future would dare mutter the big handsome fool finally died, too bad, because they were going to paint their house fronts bright colors to make his memory eternal and they were going to labor hard in the unbearable sun digging springs and planting flowers on the cliffs so that in future years at sunrise the passengers on passing boats would awaken, and with drowsy eyes they would see the rows upon rows of sunflowers and roses and the captain, who would have come down amidst all the chatter, would point to the village with its twenty or so wooden houses where the river met the sea and say, look there, see that village where the sun’s so bright the sunflowers don’t know which way to turn, yes, over there, that’s Dante’s village.

***

The above is my remix of a beautiful short story by Gabriel Garcia Marques. Here’s another example.

Book Notes: Walden by Henry David Thoreau

Walden Pond

Hard to imagine another book that is today both very-American in its reputation and creative instinct, and yet un-American in its messages and criticisms, about the best way to live, the nature of government and so on.

Understanding and finishing it was a struggle but, like a set of wind sprints, worth the effort. Among the below — all direct quotes, organized by themes — are ways of seeing the world that I’ll refer to often. To rephrase Yoshida Kenko, reading this book was communing with someone from the past whom I’ll never meet…

I learned this, at least, by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. He will put some things behind, will pass an invisible boundary; new, universal, and more liberal laws will begin to establish themselves around and within him; or the old laws be expanded, and interpreted in his favor in a more liberal sense, and he will live with the license of a higher order of beings. In proportion as he simplifies his life, the laws of the universe will appear less complex, and solitude will not be solitude, nor poverty poverty, nor weakness weakness. If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them. – Henry David Thoreau, Walden, free on Kindle

His thoughts on a free, simple and timeless life

Public opinion is a weak tyrant compared with our own private opinion. What a man thinks of himself, that it is which determines, or rather indicates, his fate.

We know but few men, a great many coats and breeches. Dress a scarecrow in your last shift, you standing shiftless by, who would not soonest salute the scarecrow?

Simplify, simplify. Instead of three meals a day, if it be necessary eat but one; instead of a hundred dishes, five; and reduce other things in proportion.

…for I lived like the Puri Indians, of whom it is said that “for yesterday, today, and tomorrow they have only one word, and they express the variety of meaning by pointing backward for yesterday forward for tomorrow, and overhead for the passing day.”

Many a forenoon have I stolen away, preferring to spend thus the most valued part of the day; for I was rich, if not in money, in sunny hours and summer days, and spent them lavishly; nor do I regret that I did not waste more of them in the workshop or the teacher’s desk.

Rise free from care before the dawn, and seek adventures. Let the noon find thee by other lakes, and the night overtake thee everywhere at home.

I would fain keep sober always; and there are infinite degrees of drunkenness. I believe that water is the only drink for a wise man; wine is not so noble a liquor; and think of dashing the hopes of a morning with a cup of warm coffee, or of an evening with a dish of tea!

All sensuality is one, though it takes many forms; all purity is one. It is the same whether a man eat, or drink, or cohabit, or sleep sensually. They are but one appetite, and we only need to see a person do any one of these things to know how great a sensualist he is. The impure can neither stand nor sit with purity.

His thoughts on philosophy and human nature

To be a philosopher is not merely to have subtle thoughts, nor even to found a school, but so to love wisdom as to live according to its dictates, a life of simplicity, independence, magnanimity, and trust. It is to solve some of the problems of life, not only theoretically, but practically

Children, who play life, discern its true law and relations more clearly than men

For what are the classics but the noblest recorded thoughts of man?

I found in myself, and still find, an instinct toward a higher, or, as it is named, spiritual life, as do most men, and another toward a primitive rank and savage one, and I reverence them both.

Those things for which the most money is demanded are never the things which the student most wants. Tuition, for instance, is an important item in the term bill, while for the far more valuable education which he gets by associating with the most cultivated of his contemporaries no charge is made.

Our whole life is startlingly moral. There is never an instant’s truce between virtue and vice. Goodness is the only investment that never fails.

It is said that Mirabeau took to highway robbery “to ascertain what degree of resolution was necessary in order to place one’s self in formal opposition to the most sacred laws of society.”

His thoughts on nature, the outdoors, the value of physical labor

My purpose in going to Walden Pond was not to live cheaply nor to live dearly there, but to transact some private business with the fewest obstacles; to be hindered from accomplishing which for want of a little common sense, a little enterprise and business talent, appeared not so sad as foolish.

I got up early and bathed in the pond; that was a religious exercise, and one of the best things which I did. They say that characters were engraven on the bathing tub of King Tchingthang to this effect: “Renew thyself completely each day; do it again, and again, and forever again.” I can understand that. Morning brings back the heroic ages.

I have never felt lonesome, or in the least oppressed by a sense of solitude, but once, and that was a few weeks after I came to the woods, when, for an hour, I doubted if the near neighborhood of man was not essential to a serene and healthy life.

But labor of the hands, even when pursued to the verge of drudgery, is perhaps never the worst form of idleness.

Walden book cover

His thoughts on our grasping, materialist culture

Our inventions are wont to be pretty toys, which distract our attention from serious things. They are but improved means to an unimproved end, an end which it was already but too easy to arrive at

Nations are possessed with an insane ambition to perpetuate the memory of themselves by the amount of hammered stone they leave.

We are eager to tunnel under the Atlantic and bring the Old World some weeks nearer to the New; but perchance the first news that will leak through into the broad, flapping American ear will be that the Princess Adelaide has the whooping cough.

Absolutely speaking, the more money, the less virtue; for money comes between a man and his objects, and obtains them for him; and it was certainly no great virtue to obtain it. It puts to rest many questions which he would otherwise be taxed to answer; while the only new question which it puts is the hard but superfluous one, how to spend it.

The best thing a man can do for his culture when he is rich is to endeavor to carry out those schemes which he entertained when he was poor.

His thoughts on the role of government, the State

The government itself, which is only the mode which the people have chosen to execute their will, is equally liable to be abused and perverted before the people can act through it.

There are thousands who are in opinion opposed to slavery and to the war, who yet in effect do nothing to put an end to them; who, esteeming themselves children of Washington and Franklin, sit down with their hands in their pockets, and say that they know not what to do, and do nothing;

Thus the State never intentionally confronts a man’s sense, intellectual or moral, but only his body, his senses. It is not armed with superior wit or honesty, but with superior physical strength.

The progress from an absolute to a limited monarchy, from a limited monarchy to a democracy, is a progress toward a true respect for the individual.